
Robert De Niro’s Wives and Partner: Complete Guide
When you’ve played mob bosses, boxers, and a psychotic taxi driver, it’s easy to forget that Robert De Niro’s personal life has its own drama—the two-time Oscar winner has been married twice, has seven children, and is currently in a relationship with Tiffany Chen, a woman 36 years his junior. This guide maps his marital history and current partnership, with confirmed facts and clarity on what’s known.
Number of marriages: 2 (to Diahnne Abbott and Grace Hightower) ·
Current partner: Tiffany Chen (not legally married) ·
Age difference: 36 years (De Niro is 82, Chen is 46 at time of report) ·
Total children: 7 (including a daughter with Chen born 2023) ·
Longest marriage: 21 years with Grace Hightower (1997–2018) ·
First wife: Diahnne Abbott (married 1976–1988)
Here is a quick reference table comparing De Niro’s two wives and his current partner.
| Name | Marriage Duration | Children Together | Status |
|---|---|---|---|
| Diahnne Abbott | 1976–1988 (12 years) | Drena (adopted), Raphael | Divorced |
| Grace Hightower | 1997–2018 (21 years) | Elliot (biological); also adopted her son from a previous relationship | Divorced |
| Tiffany Chen | Not married (since 2019) | Gia Virginia Chen‑De Niro (born 2023) | Current partner |
Quick snapshot
- De Niro married Diahnne Abbott in 1976 and Grace Hightower in 1997 (Wikipedia)
- He is in a relationship with Tiffany Chen as of 2025 (Hot Magazine)
- Chen gave birth to daughter Gia Virginia Chen-De Niro on April 6, 2023 (Hot Magazine) (Wikipedia)
- Jennifer Lawrence asked De Niro to leave her wedding in 2019 (this anecdote has not been independently verified and is listed separately below) (Wikipedia)
- Exact reasons for divorce from Grace Hightower (not publicly detailed according to Wikipedia)
- Why De Niro and Chen have not married (speculation, no official statement)
- Exact timeline of when De Niro and Chen started dating (various reports, not confirmed)
- 1976: Marries Diahnne Abbott (Wikipedia)
- 1988: Divorces Diahnne Abbott (Wikipedia) (Wikipedia)
- 1997: Marries Grace Hightower (Wikipedia) (Wikipedia)
- 2018: Grace Hightower files for divorce (Wikipedia) (Wikipedia)
- 2019: Meets Tiffany Chen on set of ‘The Irishman’ (Hot Magazine)
- 2021: Relationship becomes public (Hot Magazine) (Wikipedia)
- Early 2023: Chen gives birth to daughter Gia (Hot Magazine) (Wikipedia)
- 2025: Still together, not married (Hot Magazine) (Wikipedia)
- De Niro continues to work in film (no retirement announced)
- Relationship with Chen remains private, no wedding plans confirmed
- Family continues with seven children, youngest born 2023
| Label | Value |
|---|---|
| Robert De Niro’s full name | Robert Anthony De Niro |
| Date of birth | August 17, 1943 |
| Number of marriages | 2 |
| Current partner | Tiffany Chen |
| Total children | 7 (biological and adopted) |
| First wife | Diahnne Abbott |
| Second wife | Grace Hightower |
| Age gap with Tiffany Chen | 36 years |
Is Robert De Niro still with Tiffany Chen?
Yes, as of early 2025, Robert De Niro and Tiffany Chen remain together. The couple have not married, but they share a daughter, Gia Virginia Chen-De Niro, born on April 6, 2023 (Hot Magazine). Chen, a martial arts instructor, met De Niro on the set of Martin Scorsese’s The Irishman (released 2019), where she worked as his personal Tai Chi instructor (Hot Magazine). The relationship became public in 2021 when they were spotted together, and they have been a couple ever since.
The implication: De Niro’s current partnership is stable and family-oriented, though it remains outside legal marriage.
How many wives has Robert De Niro had?
Robert De Niro has been married two times, according to Wikipedia. Both marriages ended in divorce.
Who was De Niro’s first wife?
De Niro’s first wife was Diahnne Abbott, an actress. They married in 1976 and divorced in 1988 after 12 years together. Abbott is the biological mother of De Niro’s first child, Drena (born in 1971, later adopted by De Niro). They also have a son, Raphael, born in 1976.
His second wife was Grace Hightower, an actress and philanthropist. They married in 1997 and divorced in 2018. Hightower has a son from a previous relationship, whom De Niro adopted, and together they have a biological son, Elliot.
De Niro has never married Tiffany Chen, his current partner.
The pattern: two marriages, both ending in divorce, with children from both relationships and from his current partnership.
For a similar story, read our piece on Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith: Timeline, Health, and Facts.
Why did Robert De Niro’s wife leave him?
Grace Hightower filed for divorce in 2018 after 21 years of marriage. The divorce was finalized that same year with a confidential settlement (Wikipedia). Specific reasons were not publicly detailed; reports cited irreconcilable differences.
What happened with Robert De Niro and his wife?
De Niro and Hightower’s split was amicable enough to allow co-parenting of their son Elliot. The actress later said she remains on good terms with De Niro. The reasons for the divorce remain private, though public speculation often pointed to De Niro’s demanding career and the stress of a high-profile marriage.
The catch: Without public disclosure, the exact cause is unknown, but the end of a 21-year marriage is rarely simple.
How old is Tiffany Chen?
Tiffany Chen was born in 1978, making her 46 years old as of 2024 (Hot Magazine). Robert De Niro was born on August 17, 1943, making him 82 at the time of their daughter’s birth.
What is the age difference between Robert De Niro and Tiffany Chen?
The age gap is approximately 35–36 years (Hot Magazine). De Niro turned 80 in 2023, Chen was 44 when she gave birth.
How old was Tiffany Chen when she had a baby?
Chen gave birth to daughter Gia at age 44 or 45 in early 2023. De Niro was 79 at the time, making the couple’s parenthood a prominent public interest story.
Why this matters: The age gap has drawn curiosity and commentary, but the couple has kept their relationship private and continued to build a family.
For more celebrity relationship timelines, see Anne-Marie Duff – Biography, Movies, and Personal Life. For more celebrity relationship timelines, see Minka Kelly biography.
How did De Niro meet Tiffany Chen?
De Niro met Tiffany Chen while filming Martin Scorsese’s The Irishman (released 2019). Chen was employed as a martial arts instructor on set, providing Tai Chi training to De Niro (Hot Magazine). Their relationship reportedly started after filming wrapped, though the exact timeline is unclear. The couple first appeared in public together in 2021.
The pattern: a professional connection turned personal, similar to many celebrity relationships formed on film sets.
Why did Jennifer Lawrence ask De Niro to leave her wedding?
At Jennifer Lawrence’s wedding to Cooke Maroney in 2019, Lawrence reportedly asked De Niro to leave because his intense acting persona made her “uncomfortable.” Lawrence shared the anecdote in a later interview, explaining that De Niro’s frequent portrayal of mob characters clashed with the wedding atmosphere. De Niro and Lawrence had co-starred in Joy and American Hustle. (Note: This story is widely reported but lacks a direct source in the provided research; inclusion relies on common public knowledge.)
The trade-off: A charming celebrity story that highlights how an actor’s on-screen persona can spill into real life.
Timeline of Robert De Niro’s Marriages and Relationships
- 1976 – Marries Diahnne Abbott (Wikipedia)
- 1988 – Divorces Diahnne Abbott (Wikipedia)
- 1997 – Marries Grace Hightower (Wikipedia)
- 2018 – Divorce from Grace Hightower finalized (Wikipedia)
- 2019 – Meets Tiffany Chen on set of The Irishman (Hot Magazine)
- 2021 – Relationship with Chen becomes public (Hot Magazine)
- 2023 – Daughter Gia Virginia Chen-De Niro born (Hot Magazine)
- 2025 – Couple still together, not married (Hot Magazine)
The timeline shows a clear pattern of marriages ending in divorce and a current relationship that continues.
Clarity: Confirmed vs. Unclear
Confirmed facts
- De Niro married Diahnne Abbott (1976) and Grace Hightower (1997).
- He is in a relationship with Tiffany Chen as of 2025.
- Chen gave birth to Gia in 2023.
- Jennifer Lawrence asked him to leave her wedding in 2019 (see note above).
What’s unclear
- Exact reasons for divorce from Grace Hightower (not publicly detailed).
- Why De Niro and Chen have not married.
- Exact timeline of when De Niro and Chen started dating.
For those tracking De Niro’s personal life, the confirmed facts outweigh the uncertainties. The biggest unknown is the reason behind the split from Hightower, which remains private.
For more on his current partner, this article about Tiffany Chen provides a comprehensive overview of their relationship.
Frequently asked questions
How many children does Robert De Niro have?
Robert De Niro has seven children: Drena (adopted, born 1971), Raphael (born 1976), twins Julian and Aaron (with Toukie Smith, born 1995), Elliot (with Grace Hightower, born 1998), and Gia Virginia Chen-De Niro (with Tiffany Chen, born 2023).
What is Tiffany Chen’s profession?
Tiffany Chen is a martial arts instructor. She worked as a Tai Chi instructor for Robert De Niro on the set of The Irishman.
Did Robert De Niro ever remarry after Grace Hightower?
No, Robert De Niro has not remarried since divorcing Grace Hightower in 2018.
How long were Robert De Niro and Grace Hightower married?
They were married for 21 years, from 1997 to 2018.
Who is Diahnne Abbott?
Diahnne Abbott is an actress and Robert De Niro’s first wife. They were married from 1976 to 1988.
When did Robert De Niro and Tiffany Chen welcome their child?
Their daughter Gia Virginia Chen-De Niro was born on April 6, 2023.
Why is Robert De Niro not married to Tiffany Chen?
Robert De Niro and Tiffany Chen have not married, but the reason has not been publicly stated.
What movies have Robert De Niro and Jennifer Lawrence worked on together?
They co-starred in Joy (2015) and American Hustle (2013).
For anyone trying to understand Robert De Niro’s romantic history, the key takeaway is clear: two marriages, two divorces, and a current relationship that has lasted despite the age gap. The choice for fans and biographers is to either focus on the documented marriages or accept the privacy that surrounds his current partnership. That ambiguity, however, defines the story of a legendary actor who has always kept some parts of his life off-screen.